The fight over Ted William's
body is on, and it exemplifies the New New Economy as much as anything
we can think of lately. Apparently son John Henry Williams wants to
cryogenically freeze Ted's head
and sell it on eBay to the highest bidder. (Apparently Oracle's Larry Ellison
- who has made his own name by putting the heads of his rivals on sticks-
has expressed interest in buying the Splendid Splinter's noggin.) However
Ted William's estranged daughter wants to go the tasteful route and merely
store his DNA to splice and clone in the years to come.
In his last 15 years of life, Ted had quite a nostalgia company going
and was a good businessman. However, its pretty safe to say that when Ted was
succession planning for his business, he never contemplated this
gruesomeness. The lesson, then, is that you have to prepare your business
for any possible eventuality to maintain it as a viable entity after you die.
You should also accept the fact that your corpse may be knocked around like
a tetherball on a white-trash playground, perhaps in the courts or perhaps
even literally. Its ghoulish to think about, but what's to stop any of us
from winding up like Ted or his WWII rival Mussolini in
the end? When its all said and done, remember: it's a world of severed heads
on pointed sticks and all you and I can do is live in it.
4:30:57 PM
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